it's all beyond comprehension

i ran into a friend at a show yesterday and i was so freaked out i couldn't even look at her.

then her girlfriend kissed me hello and asked for help with her dress and i thought "wow. really? thank god." because i really missed them, but because of the troubles with the one, i thought maybe they were out of my friend loop forevers.

and then after the show, they both came over and hugged me hello and we laughed a lot. a lot. and it was really nice. but it's hard to tell what motivations are, and so i hedged my bets with "show etiquette" and went on my way, all nostalgic.

and then she wrote me in the chat box today and i was afraid to read it and it was totally nice and i think we are ok.

and that is two in a week for old friends with awkward silences that are clearing up.

sometimes life is just too much to understand and i just have to breathe and be grateful and sometimes, you know, just miss the train because i went back for my lipstick. and let it all fall into place.